Alcohol: A Red Flag Or The Recipe For A Perfect Date?

Ah, the first date jitters. Best case, you will spend the next hour bumbling through the conversation hoping you don’t say something embarrassing. Worst case, your shaky hands and sweaty palms will make you spill your drink over the table and into your date’s lap… That will make an impression.

Often all you need is a glass or wine or a shot or two to calm your nerves and become your confident self. With close to 90% of people admitting to experiencing anxiety ahead of meeting someone for the first time, it’s no wonder that drinks are typically top of the menu when it comes to planning a date.

Flirtini surveyed 2,000 adults on their attitudes towards alcohol before and during a date. The results? A little tipple is unlikely to harm your dating prospects — but you need to know your limit.

Drinking habits, meet dating etiquette

Should you wear something low-cut or a little more modest? Will you greet them with a hug, kiss or a handshake? Should you mention your weird hobbies or pretend to be someone you’re not?

If your mind tends to race ahead of a first date and it takes a glass or two to get the nerves under control, you’re not alone — In fact, 64% of people drink alcohol before a date at least occasionally.

For many, the party doesn’t stop when they meet their match. Some 28% continue to drink after they arrive and another 34% feel it depends on the situation. While alcohol is perfectly acceptable if you’re bonding at a bar, maybe it’s best to wait if you’re getting to know each other at a fine art exhibition.

A little social lubrication can lighten the mood and get the conversation flowing, but for 65% of those that choose to drink during a date, they’re not doing it for the fun of it — They’re doing it to feel less anxious and more confident.

Drinking your way towards a dating disaster

However, you don’t want all inhibitions to go out the window. One glass too many and you could find yourself crying over your ex, breaking your ‘no sex before the third date’ rule, or waking up with a sore head and empty bank account.

Of those that abstain while on a date, 58% do so because they fear saying something odd or where a night of drinking might take them.

It’s good to be cautious — especially when you’ve had a few too many alcohol-induced faux pas in the past… such as forgetting your partner’s name. This is a slip-up that 28% of people have suffered (and we’ll hazard a guess that it probably cost most of them a second date).

Another round: A red flag in the dating world?

Need a glass of red with your meal to take the edge off? Relax. For 85% of people, it isn’t a dealbreaker. In fact, alcohol often makes for a great wingman, with more than a third agreeing it can spice up a dull date.

It was probably the booze that scored for you in the first place. While it might not matter much to those of the male persuasion, 62% of women feel more attracted to men that show alcohol in their dating profile pictures.

But what it really comes down to is whether you’re compatible, with 60% of men and 67% of women agreeing that partners need to share similar attitudes towards alcohol for a relationship to blossom.

If your idea of a fun date is an early morning hike and your partner would prefer to drink a bar dry, chances are you will both be back on the dating apps by this time tomorrow.

So if you meet someone that passes the eye test, it’s best to talk alcohol before you take things further. For 39% of people, alcohol isn’t just a bit of fun — It’s an important first date topic.

Alcohol intolerance: Do you know your limit?

Some 28% of people have had a partner show up drunk to a date — which often doesn’t make the strongest of first impressions. When alcohol is involved, there’s typically a fine line between entertaining and engaging, and annoying and obnoxious. Chances are, if you turn up steaming drunk, your date won’t find you all that hot.

If you happen to over do it, you probably shouldn’t wait on a call back in the morning. While most are willing to make exceptions for the right person (and the persona they take on when intoxicated), 24% say they would cut off a partner who got drunk on the first date.

And that’s only if you’re lucky enough to make it to the end of the night… If you happen to match with one of the 28% of people that have left a date due to their partner’s drinking, they might not wait for you to empty your glass before slipping out the back.

That’s why it’s so important to speak to your partner and listen to your body before you order another beverage. We all have different tolerance levels — both in the amount we can handle and the amount we feel is acceptable. If you’re not mindful, you will likely face a choice: another drink or another date?

Methodology: To create this study, researchers from Flirtini surveyed 2,000 adults aged over 18 years old. The study includes participants of all genders and ethnicities.

Join us for Sober October on Flirtini! We encourage you to connect across a wider range of interests beyond alcohol. During this time, the interest “wine” will be temporarily disabled in the app. New users will not be able to select “wine” as an interest, and existing users will see it disabled on their profiles and on other users’ profiles! Let your matches connect to the sober rhythm!