Dating App Conversation Starters That Won't Make You Cringe

Written by Dating Expert and Coach
Rikki Dymond
05/23/2023

Reaching out to someone on a dating app can be nerve-racking — even if you’re an experienced online dater! When deciding if you want to message someone, it’s important to make sure that you only reach out to people who you’re actually interested in meeting in real life. Remember that there’s an actual human on the other side of that message, someone who has feelings and is likely looking for a real connection, so don’t waste anyone’s time with messages that don’t have the potential to lead anywhere.

If a profile piques your interest, do a deep dive, don’t just look at their pictures.Take some time to read about their interests, life experiences, and other information they’ve provided to see if they are someone you’d be interested in meeting.

Once you've reviewed their profile and have decided that they are someone you would want to meet up with, it’s time to reach out.

Here are some tips to create a great conversation starter:
  1. Ask a Question About Their Profile: Show them that you took the time to read their profile by commenting on something you saw.
    • “I noticed that you love to cook. What’s your signature dish?”
    • “I see you love to cook. That’s great because I love to eat ;). If I was hosting a dinner party, what dish would you bring?”
    • “I adore your travel photos! I love travelling!! What’s the last/best place you’ve been?”
  2. Comment About a Similarity You Noticed: One of the best ways to connect on a dating app is through similar interests or shared hobbies.
    • “That’s awesome that you love live music. I’m a huge music fan too! What was the last/best concert you went to?”
    • “Hey! Fellow bookworm here!! What's the best book you’ve read? I’m always looking for new recommendations.”
    • “Hey hey, I’m also an avid traveller! If we went on a trip together, where would we go and why?”
  3. Use Humor: Humor is one of the best ways to break the ice! Make a joke or ask an interesting question that they likely haven’t heard before.
    • “Let’s play a game! Tell me two truths and a lie about you and I’ll try to guess the lie!”
    • “Out of all of the people on this app, what are the chances that we would match?! It must be destiny ;)”
    • “Your profile has some nice pics but hardly anything in the bio! Tell me the best, worst, and weirdest thing about you!”
  4. Ask Open-Ended Questions: If you want to get a better sense of who someone is or how they live their life, ask intriguing questions that prompt a response.
    • “What are your 3 favorite ways to spend the weekend?”
    • “If you won a million dollars, what’s the first thing you would do with it?”
    • “Top 3 best restaurants in town? Go!”
    • “If I asked your friends for three words to describe you, what would they be?”

To summarize, keep the questions open-ended to spark interesting and fun conversations, remember to keep the first interactions with someone light and fun, and don’t be afraid to show your sense of humor.

Take a deep breath and relax because conversation starters are just that, a way to start a conversation. Now get out there and start chatting!

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