Here's What You Should Do If You've Been Ghosted

Written by Dating Expert and Coach
Rikki Dymond

Ghosting is the most disrespectful and cowardly ways to let someone know you are no longer interested in them. Ghosting occurs when someone disappears or ends a relationship (usually a casual or shorter one) by cutting off communication entirely. This can include no longer texting or calling, and in extreme situations, blocking the other person without explanation.

It’s a painful and confusing situation because the ghostee (the person who has been ghosted) doesn’t receive any clarity or closure from the relationship. Understandably, many people become overwhelmed with emotion and either try to beg or plead that the ghoster reconsider their decision or at least provide some closure. This usually doesn’t get the result they hope for and many people end up feeling worse.

So, why do people ghost? Simple answer, ghosting is more convenient. It’s easier than having a conversation with someone about how you feel, which would require navigating around their feelings.

In newer relationships, people might ghost after an interaction in which they’ve been offended or someone has acted in an unpleasant way. People also might ghost because they don’t feel safe — either because they have a gut feeling or are reacting to a specific situation.

So, you’ve been ghosted. Now what?

The best thing you can do if you’ve been ghosted is to know that you deserve to be with someone who wants to be with you, someone who sees the awesome person that you are and loves you despite all your quirks and even your flaws (because we all have them!). If the person you’re seeing doesn't want to be with you, and removes themselves from your life in such an immature way, you’ve dodged a bullet filled with future pain and heartbreak. Could or should they have done it more respectfully? Definitely! But their actions are out of your control and they have just shown you their true cowardly colors.

Do not give them an ego boost by pleading for another chance or making them feel better about their decision by unleashing hellfire on them. They don’t deserve another moment of your time, so walk away with your head held high and go treat yourself to some self-love and care.

One of the best ways to soothe an aching heart is to give yourself all the love and adoration that you hoped to receive from them, so go ahead and give back to yourself!

Know that you will not be a good match for everyone, but there are many people in this world who will love you for you, so do not let this tiny blip in time determine your worth. Fill your life with people and things that lift you up and make you happy. One of the most desirable qualities in a potential partner is someone who’s already got a full and amazing life! Focus on yourself, keep your energy open, and the ones who are right for you will come along.

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